when i lay my thoughts in front of me like a spread arc of playing cards, i shake my head at the contemptible thought of arranging them for this blog, instead of letting the ideas dictate the direction of the blog.
but it does beg the question: what do i really want to say? I am keeping a positive attitude that i will survive this latest ripple in my battle, however I would be naive if i didn't think about what I may want to concentrate on if this is indeed my last year.
I am reading some philosophy... most of which makes me roll my eyes only because the observations were with me already, but i am reading them simply to proof that they are with me, because if I demand accountability in others, I must proof some sort of connection to the running leaders of the topics that interest me.
i think the best place to start is in discussing my last post. it has occurred to me that some may view it as dark and depressing. the rantings of someone who is trying to come to grips with the possibility of death.
do i do that? absolutely. was that my intention in the last post. nope.
what i am trying to do is form some sort of construct in which i can think about particular topics from a very realistic point of view while at the same time analyzing the holistic point of view.
a common message from me is the fact that we as individuals need to become more accountable for the thoughts and ideas we express. the wisdom that an individual is reasonable but a group of people are irrationally insane is quite right. and why? because up to this point we have omitted from our many ideas on ethics and mores accountability in the majority of information that is being transferred.
it is time that more than a small intelligentsia contemplate the universe. It is time that there is expectation for someone to critically apply tests to their own ideas for both the reality on the individual tree and the forest in which that tree resides.
Too often we let abstract ideas that embody possible truths of our existence be ridiculed in lieu of being taken seriously when weighing actual questions of policy. just because our feet have to hit the ground eventually, and we have to make a decision that will no doubt be imperfect, does not mean that we push away the sky from which we came from.
it shouldn't be me going back and reading different viewpoints of the respected philosophers of our past. it should be those that rather give me a funny face and tell me how strange and crazy i am simply because they can't walk with me in a discussion that goes beyond real estate taxes.
to be fair, it should be both of us.
i get it. i understand that while i am no great mind or expert, i have had the fortunate of being able to ponder these ideas for years in an environment that challenged but did not disrupt. this gives me the advantage of grasping abstract ideas and their connections to the real world faster. but that is all it is...is faster.
and the true intelligentsia of this world... those who probably read this and grin, like they would at a freshman in a class they are teaching, are much much faster than me. while the expansion of that class of thinker is important, what is vital is the increase of that type of thinking altogether. everyone is capable, they are just unwilling or too restricted to try.
so perhaps thats where i'm going. I don't know yet. but it seems reasonable to look at current events and analyze them through that lens. more importantly breaking down issues to social progress versus individual rights. or maybe not, i refuse to nail it down in my head, even though i am tempted from time to time, because if i was provocative and placate a particular social group, i could gain readership.
i must remind myself that the end never justifies the means. that this is for me. i would love to have people read, discuss, and perhaps expand their perspectives as they expand mine. if i said i didn't, i would be lying. but ultimately, if i believe in this process of laying out my ideas, then to do anything beyond that purpose would be to compromise intent and, honestly, content. and if i had the good fortune of gaining readers, it will be with genuine intent, and honest content. and if not, then hopefully there exists now or in the future, someone else who accomplishes it.
you know how they say a politician slowly becomes corrupt by making little compromises along the way, and that is how politics seems to be automatically linked to the game of disingenuous dealings to gain power with which you can do good things with.
it is because the politician, no matter how genuine and pure he is, will ultimately come to a point where he has to decide whether to proceed with a compromise of purity rather than a compromise in transparent, public discussion so that he can continue with what he thinks is needed: his election. for the good of the people.
the latter is a good thing. no politician running should have anything short of that amount of confidence. however, that doesn't justify compromising the integrity of the system. the arrogance that you are absolutely right, and there is no possibility that you are not good for the country, is irrational and idiotic. yet it is the driving force behind most marketable things from candidates to fruit juice.
instead, one must look at the whole of time. as i had said yesterday, paraphrasing fighting club, sooner or later everyone's survival rate goes to zero.
well if you go along long enough, the probability will rise to 100 that someone who does not give into corruption in the slightest will come along with all the other variables being in the right place that they will proceed to do right by the people without having to compromise integrity or owe. everytime, that doesn't happen, we put further distance between us and that event.
today it is not possible, or rather it would be one in a trillion. mostly because of the presumption of corruption being necessary in politics. of course right now, everyone is playing the game so as not to lose any political footing. i get that.
but what of the individual? the MOMENT a person starts to contemplate corruption or corruption of ideals to gain power, is the moment that that person proves unworthy. but sometimes there is an anomaly... and the first isn't remembered,the second is barely recognized.... and a thousand years later the game withered.
for one must ask, why am i running? is it to protect the freedoms of americans, is it to better america society as a whole, or is it a calling to push a specific agenda? why am i so important? is every one of my actions linked to a general belief that i am playing a long term role, and all i can do is show myself for what i think and it may be my turn? or am i going to hide myself, because i believe it is more important to win so i can share my greatness?
i haven't read one historic story that didn't have good things come out of bad, and bad things come out of good. and most compromises have future consequences. so does it not stand to reason, that even if you did do your "good" could it not still lead to bad? and if that is the case, would it not make better sense to attempt to achieve that good through a genuine plea to the people so you have no shackles of compromise?
the best we can ever hope for is to hope we are right. "knowing" is for posters, but is an ideal that will never be attained. and you may know better, but if you truly believed in progress of society or progress of the individual, you must allow the opposition a fair shake, for when pride is placed underfoot and dignity is held strong in our hearts, both incorrect and correct ideas will benefit in time.
you wait around long enough, the probability of a bad event turning into something good goes to one hundred. the only thing we have is the way we conducted ourselves, how much we respected those who follow us, and the line items of compromise which are either corrupt power plays, or true discussions of genuine ideas.
its the moral of "fool" tales, where the hero is a fool who doesn't know better and their honesty and good will gets taken advantage of, but in the end it is to the detriment of those who tried to take advantage. in real life, not every fool wins out, in fact the majority do not, but those who do win have a more powerful victory, and over time the sums of those losses and victories make for the better portion of our society.